


Reality

by OptimalShip



Category: Heavy Rain
Genre: After the Warehouse, Kind of fluffy, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-08
Updated: 2014-02-08
Packaged: 2018-01-11 14:19:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1174090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OptimalShip/pseuds/OptimalShip
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Norman Jayden's fake reality could be bent and twisted just as easily as he could move his hand. A wet and muddy scene could be scavenged thoroughly for clues. A person's entire identity could be revealed from a view of their face. Reality for him was being able to manipulate the actual reality.</p><p>Real reality was terrible. Real reality was the stress of the Origami Killer case, it was his hands shaking of Triptocaine withdrawal, it was Carter Blake yelling and shoving him. It was feeling like crap all the fucking time and dark, cloudy skies that threatened the rain that was soon to come.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jayden's Reality

**Author's Note:**

> Set after the Warehouse mission. Ethan did the Shark Trial and managed to find and save Shaun, Madison had called Jayden who came in and fought Scott. Madison was able to stop the police from shooting Ethan, and Scott had died.  
> I just really love this pairing! I find Blayden super cute, and this ship doesn't get all the love it should. I wanted to write something for it, so I did and I really hope all of you Blayden shippers out there like it!

The ARI always projected a fake reality.

It twisted the real world around until Jayden couldn't remember what reality actually was. For him, reality was a computer generated world that could be changed at any second by a flick of his wrist. It was Mars, or a fall breeze in the middle of a forest, or the bright ocean surrounding him, even the edge of a canyon cliff. In his fake realities, they felt so real that Jayden's mind had started thinking of them as actual reality. The breeze around him actually whispered across his skin, the distant cry of birds were the actual animals of the world. Everything was real.

Norman Jayden's fake reality could be bent and twisted just as easily as he could move his hand. A wet and muddy scene could be scavenged thoroughly for clues. A person's entire identity could be revealed from a view of their face. Reality for him was being able to manipulate the actual reality.

Real reality was terrible. Real reality was the stress of the Origami Killer case, it was his hands shaking of Triptocaine withdrawal, it was Carter Blake yelling and shoving him. It was feeling like crap all the fucking time and dark, cloudy skies that threatened the rain that was soon to come.

Jayden had never been fond of rain, and Philadelphia seemed to have quite a lot of it. He always hated that part most about the real reality.

It was cold, freezing over every piece of exposed skin on him, and then some. From a brief experience in Canada in the winter, Jayden had decided he hated feeling cold and tried to stay warm as much as possible and avoid cold places. He much preferred staying inside of his car with the heater cranked high instead of actually getting out.

If the cold wasn't bad enough, the rain soaked Jayden to the bone. He really hated the feeling of water making it's way over his body, soaking through his clothes and over his face. He found himself gritting his teeth and wiping the back of his hand across his face quite a bit to try to get some of the water off (it never worked; his hand was always too wet.). He worried that ARI would get broken, but it stayed working as impeccable as it always had.

But he could deal with the cold and wet aspects of rain. It was the memories he hated the most. The memories were an associate of real reality, another thing that was out to ruin his life.

The memories of all the sleepless nights, the stress, the complete feeling of being dumbstruck. The memory of chasing Scott Shelby all the way to the killer's death. They all happened when ARI was off.

When the glasses were off, Jayden wondered why the case had affected him so much. Why, every time he seemed to close his eyes, he was plagued with the memories of the day Shaun Mars had been found. It had all been resolved (Ethan had managed to resuscitate his son, Madison had made sure the police hadn't killed him on sight, and Jayden had lived through his fight with Scott) but Jayden still thought about it a lot.

He kept seeing rain pouring, the ground far below him. He remembered how he had almost made a terrible mistake; he had pulled Scott Shelby up, and he'd almost gone over the edge. Even his fake reality couldn't get rid of the terror he still felt.

Jayden could still feel his hands grabbing for anything to pull himself up. And his heart still beat wildly in his chest when he remembered that he had lived. The rain had poured on his face and he had stared at the sky, breathing hard and ignoring the sound of the machine that had shredded the Origami Killer.

The police had eventually found him, coaxing him down. When Jayden had finally managed to step onto the ground, he'd felt the exhaustion of the case come crashing onto him, all the exhaustion that his fake reality had withheld from him. All the stress, constant thinking, and the lack of his Triptocaine had all flooded onto him like the constant downpour of rain, and it weighed more than a gallon of water on his frail shoulders. His whole body had felt like it weighed a ton, and he had shuffled forward, ignoring the questions; they could wait. There was no more danger. Most of the police were gone anyway, except for a few who had stayed behind for Jayden and to look over the scene.

Jayden had stopped when he found his partner standing in front of him. The brick wall that was Carter Blake stood in his way, arms crossed and an almost angry look on his face. But it was mixed in with another emotion that surprised Jayden; concern had been in Blake's eyes, no matter how much the man had squinted them in a glare.

"Well?" He said, raising an eyebrow.

"Blake..." Jayden swallowed hard and tried to take another step, but instead collapsed forward, his legs giving out under him.

Jayden assumed he'd crumple to the ground, but he felt strong hands grabbing onto his arms, holding him up. Jayden couldn't bring himself to look up or try to stand, but instead had just hung his head against his partner's chest and let the rain pour over the both of them.

"The fuck, Norman?" Blake hissed, and Jayden had felt Blake's hands tighten on his arms. Jayden waited for the shove, waited for the violence that always accompanied the lieutenant to make a reappearance.

But it didn't come. Instead, Blake just mumbled, "Shit." and wound an arm around Jayden's waist, supporting him. He started pulling Jayden away, snapping at anyone that tried to question Jayden ("Could you fuck off? Can't you see the kid is fucking exhausted? Jesus.").

Jayden stayed silent and half conscious as Blake unceremoniously pushed him into the lieutenant's car. He slumped back against the seat, shivering a bit and letting his head fall back. He heard the driver's door open and Blake slide in.

The heat from the car was a welcome feeling, and Jayden's eyes closed, letting the warmth and the smooth rocking of the car as it drove away. Lights flashed over Jayden's closed eyes, blue and red, and he wondered how many cops had come to see the Origami Killer.

They didn't go far. Blake basically drove around the block and pulled over in front of a building. Jayden's eyes opened and he glanced over at his partner.

Blake had been gripping the steering wheel, looking at Jayden with curious eyes. His shoulders were slumped slightly, his eyebrows raised.

Neither man said anything, the only sound being the soft pitter-patter of rainfall on the roof of the car. Jayden stared into the hazel of Blake's eyes.

"What happened?" Blake said after the long silence.

Jayden turned his head away, but found himself talking. It was quiet, practically a whisper, but, from the way he stared and nodded, Blake could hear every word. Jayden told him about the phone call he'd received Madison, how he'd arrived just in time to stop Scott from shooting Ethan. He'd grown more quiet, giving not too many details about the fight with Scott.

"Well?" Blake snapped after, and the harshness of it made Jayden look back over at him.

"What?"

"Aren't you going to say it?" Blake gritted his teeth, tilting his head as if he was challenging Jayden.

"What?" Jayden said again, raising his eyebrows in confusion.

"I told you so. Aren't you going to fucking tell me that you were right and I was wrong?" Blake chuckled darkly.

Jayden hadn't even considered teasing Blake about it. All he had been thinking about was how it was all over.

He shook his head. "Not right now."

He expected Blake to lash out, to yell or try to punch him. Instead, they sat in silence.

"Not right now?" Blake repeated eventually, chuckling a bit. "So, later you're going to tell me I was wrong? I would've thought that you'd love telling me just how wrong I was."

"And I would've thought that you'd be beating the shit out of me for going alone or not talking to you about it, so it looks like we're both surprised." Jayden ran a hand through his still wet hair, feeling the dampness wet his fingers.

Blake chuckled again, but a bit louder. "Fuck, Jayden. Always so full of attitude."

Jayden managed a tiny smile and turned his head to look at Blake again. Blake smiled a bit back, and Jayden realized this was probably the first time they'd had a civil conversation. It was nice. Jayden liked the sound of Blake's laugh when it wasn't used to make Jayden feel like an idiot.

Blake's smile faded suddenly, and his eyes hardened. "Don't ever do that again." His voice was completely serious, any hint of amusement gone.

"What?"

"Go off on your own. Jayden...fuck." Blake closed his eyes tightly, gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles turned white. "You could've died, you fucking idiot."

Jayden swallowed hard, and (unknown to him that this would only be the first time, definitely not the last) he had flashbacks of his fight with Scott. The sound of rain was suddenly too loud, and he wasn't in Blake's car, he was scrambling backwards away from the large killer. His hands shook a bit and his teeth chattered.

The feeling wasn't as bad as withdrawal. Jayden doubted anything would ever be that bad. But it was close. The complete terror of having almost lost his life so easily washed over him like the downpour of rain had, going over every inch of his body and into every crack. Soon, he couldn't tell where he was. Blake's car, or the warehouse? Inside, or outside? Alive, or dead?

Reality would fade away now even with the glasses off. Jayden's mind would drift, and he'd be on the edge of the canyon, or propped up against a tree, or drowning in the ocean.  
At the moment, it felt more like drowning in rain. As if the Origami Killer wasn't dead and Jayden had been his next victim.

Blake seemed to notice, and he released the steering wheel to firmly clasp his hand on Jayden's shoulder, pulling the young man back to the real reality. And reality was a warm car parked outside a rusty building with the rain starting to slow for what felt like the first time in forever.

Reality was Blake saying, "You fucking idiot." again and then tugging Jayden closer until his hand wasn't on Jayden's shoulder, but instead grabbing onto his wrist and pressing his fingers in. It was the small hesitation when their faces weren't even an inch apart that Blake did, stopping only to stare into Jayden's eyes.

Reality was the soft feeling of Jayden's partner's lips pressed up against his own. It was the warmth of those lips that rivaled that of the car, it was the feeling of a tiny bit of rain that dripped from their hair over their lips that made the kiss taste like sweet water and the wet Philadelphia sky.

The rain outside dripped to a slow stop, and Jayden had never felt more alive in a moment before.


	2. Blake's Reality

Reality for Carter Blake was not something he struggled to identify, but, instead, something he chose to deny.

Not everything always went his way, and the reality of his life was that he was wrong a lot of the time. For years, he had been wrong about the identity of the Origami Killer, and, even when the long awaited profiler came, he still kept making wrong decisions. Up until the very last moment, he had been wrong.

He'd made wrong moves, wrong decisions. He'd ignored practically everything his partner said and lashed out. He insisted he was right. Fuck, him and Jayden had been on entirely different paths, up to when Jayden had even accused Blake of killing all those children. Even now the reminder stung him.

But out of everything he had done wrong during the case, falling in love with Norman Jayden was probably one of the worst mistakes he'd made. 

Blake wouldn't necessarily call it falling in love, but he knew there were some strong feelings inside of him for the FBI agent.

Carter Blake was not gay. He liked his women, and, even when he started feeling things for Jayden, he still liked looking at women. In the past, he'd spent much of his free time at strip clubs or bars, where he was most likely to meet easy hookups. Hell, he had almost spent a night with Lauren Winter while investigating her during the disappearance of her son, but she'd just been to broken and sad. He had dropped any hinting of using her services and had gone back to investigating the case.

At first, Blake hadn't really understood what he was feeling when he looked at Jayden. It had confused him, since he'd never really felt anything like that. He found himself staring at Jayden much more than he should've been, his eyes lingering on his eyes or lips. Jayden was quite handsome, Blake would admit it. He wasn't so stubborn or stupid that he couldn't admit when someone was attractive. But he found more than just Jayden's physical features attractive.

Jayden was a very dedicated person when it came to his work, and Blake had to respect that. Though Blake acted as if he couldn't give an fucks about his job, he did his best to be thorough and dedicated. Jayden seemed to be able to do it without even thinking. And, when Blake wasn't pushing him, Jayden was quite a kind person. He was calm and sympathetic, choosing to look at all possibilities and try to connect with the victims.

It was all his feelings for Jayden and how he noticed him that made Blake lash out against him.

The confusing feelings, the weird emotions that bubbled up inside of him, they all caused Blake to feel extreme frustration when it came to Norman Jayden. He couldn't stand that cute, determined look Jayden got on his face sometimes. He absolutely hated everything Jayden did, but he also loved all of it.  
And that, of course, confused and irritated him even more.

The reality of it, though, was that Blake was falling in love with Norman Jayden, no matter how much he chose to deny the truth. The feelings were unnecessary, and extremely unwanted.

He dealt with his reality the only way he knew how; until it was something he desired, Blake would keep beating and fighting reality until it gave him what he wanted. And, only recently, only when Jayden started going off on his own and getting himself into more trouble than he should've been, only when Jayden almost died, did Blake decide that he wanted Jayden.

When Jayden had fallen into his arms the rainy day that the Origami Killer had met his grizzly end, that had been the last piece of the fucked up puzzle Blake had been trying to put together in his head. So he'd held up the younger man in his arms, holding him close to him and trying his best to protect him from whatever else Jayden needed to be protected from (Jayden was quite a brave person, so Blake decided that being protected from the police would have to do for now.).

Sitting quietly in his car, Blake had been trying his hardest to think of some way to make a move, or maybe apologize for being a huge asshole throughout their experience together. But he'd gotten lost in the completely broken look on Jayden's face. He could tell from every slight sigh and movement of his head that the kid was exhausted. And Blake could tell that it went more than just skin deep. It bore into the younger man until his body slumped back, unable to deal with anymore and so relieved it was over. Blake couldn't have agreed more. The Origami Killer case was over and done with, Shaun Mars was safe, and Ethan Mars was innocent. And, the most important thing in Blake's mind, Jayden was alive. He was sitting beside him, his chest moving slightly with tiny breaths, his face slightly flushed, water dripping down his face, and so very alive.

Blake's heart had unexpectedly thumped in his chest and he swallowed hard. With the rain pouring outside but coming to a slow stop, Blake had tried not to over think his course of action. He'd chosen what he wanted from his reality, and what he wanted was the man beside him.

Unconsciously, Blake felt like he knew that when he got Jayden alone and talked to him like he should've been this entire time, he wouldn't be able to stop himself. It didn't surprise him when he felt himself tugging the profiler closer, his fingers wrapping around Jayden's wrist.

Blake's entire personality revolved around throwing caution to the wind and deciding he'd worry about consequences later. When it came to Jayden, though, things were different.  
He hesitated, right before his lips touched his partner's. He'd hesitated to see if Jayden would pull away, would yell out or scramble away. But he hadn't. Jayden's eyes had slowly closed, his head tilted in anticipation of the kiss that Blake soon gave him.

To his surprise, Jayden didn't pull away. Instead, he pulled his wrist away, twined their fingers together, and leaned closer.

They didn't do too much, no huge make out scenes exploded from them. They sat in the car, slowly moving their lips against the other's, surrounded by the warmth of the car and each other. Blake squeezed Jayden's hand, letting his other hand rest on the back of Jayden's neck to hold him to him.

They kissed until the rain outside had completely stopped outside, then they had slowly pulled apart. Jayden's eyes weren't entirely open, staring at Blake from behind his drooped eyelids, and his mouth was slightly open. Blake rubbed his thumb over the back of Jayden's neck, staring at him without saying a word.

"Cartah..." Jayden's accent came out thick, his voice lower than usual. His eyes opened more, his eyebrows raising questioningly.

Blake sighed and pulled away, but kept Jayden's fingers held tightly between his own. He gave them a squeeze, and Jayden tugged a bit-not to pull away, but to get Blake to look at him.

Jayden was leaning back in the seat, staring at Blake and rubbing the back of his neck. His eyebrows were still raised.

"So, I'm an idiot for going off alone, or not realizing your feelings?" Jayden finally said, his voice filled with teasing and a look of amusement on his face.

Blake scoffed, rolling his eyes. Leave it to Jayden to make a joke after Blake's not-so-official admittance of his feelings.

"Both. You're an idiot for both." 

Jayden chuckled a bit, nodding his head slightly. "Yeah, I like you too, Blake."

Blake's eyebrows raised, and he ignored the soaring feeling in his chest. He kept his face blank. "How?"

Jayden smiled a tiny bit, his cheeks a bit flushed. He looked more awake than he had when Blake had first put him into the car.

Jayden gave Blake's hand a squeeze and leaned forward slowly, cautiously, as if he was afraid as to how Blake would react. He reached towards Blake with his free hand, his palm hovering near the older man's cheek. Blake leaned in at the same time that Jayden pressed his hand to Blake's cheek.

Jayden's thumb rubbed softly against his partner's cheek, and he pulled Blake in close until their noses touched. Blake's eyes closed in anticipation, but Jayden turned his head so he could nuzzle his cheek against the lieutenant's.

Blake sat perfectly still, feeling Jayden's breath against his cheek and neck. It raised goosebumps against his skin, so very unlike the ones he'd get from the freezing rain. Instead of feeling cold, Blake felt warm, especially wherever Jayden was touching him.

"Like this." Jayden breathed, and pulled back just enough to look into Blake's eyes.

Reality for Carter Blake was not something he struggled to identify, but, instead, something he chose to deny.

But, when his reality was the warm body of Norman Jayden close to his own, and Jayden's breath whispering against his skin, Blake didn't even want to deny his reality.

Reality was, instead, something he accepted, for the moment at least. Reality was him pulling Jayden's lips back to his own for another kiss, and reality was knowing that he wouldn't deny it any longer.

Out of everything Blake had done right during the case, falling in love with Norman Jayden was probably one of the best things he'd done.

If Blake wasn't going to deny his feelings anymore, Blake knew he would call it falling in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who read this! I hope you liked it!  
> I hope to write more Blayden in the future, so, if you liked this one, let me know. :)


End file.
